Tuesday, 27 July 2010

Man City and Stevenage

The new most hated club in England? Hmm, I still feel Chelsea are edging it still just on the fans basis. But with Man City linked with every player in Europe valued above £20 million. Alas, we can see however that money certainly does not grant immediate success. Two pre-season friendlies played, two pre-season friendlies lost. So lets just hope this form is replicated in the league and they suffer.

Anyway, tonight's game at Stevenage will be on our minds as we almost anxiously hope that the players come back from some underpar performances against lower opposition. In fact it is quite scary how quickly the new season has come around. I hear the women sighing and groaning. The calamity of the WC has faded and it's almost time to play. Men are entering bookies up and down the country predicting the promotee's and the top scorers. The plans for the designated pub for Pompey away are beginning to be made.

The confusion of football fans on a Saturday afternoon is a week and a half away. Life is football, football is life for us.

Anyway, Stevenage away tonight. £18. F*** that.

Monday, 26 July 2010

AC Watford

Not too sure about the new away kit yet. It certainly is a change from the normal red strip we have that is for sure. The AC Milan style kit is priced at a whooping £41 for adults!

Unbelievable Jeff.

However, on the plus side, it does hopefully remind everyone of the unforgotten mauling of the scum on their own dump of a stomping ground. So if you are having one of those 'Monday's' at work and need some cheering up, here you go:


32 minutes gone, Lootown 0-4 Watford. Everything about the scum on that day was laughable. Pure genius.

On a further note, doesn't Graham look scarily like....

11 days

We are only 11 days away from the new 2010/11 Championship season which is about the time where most football fans begin to feel anxious whether their squad is good enough to exceed pre-season expectations. We start to predict the sort of season our team will have by just going on a mere 4 pre-season friendlies. So two wins against non-league opposition along with a loss and a draw against two league two outfits. What do we make of it? Can we? Is it too early to hold our opinions on Watford's season to come? It is difficult to answer. Pre-season scores, for sure, are nothing to dwell on. People who didn't go to St. Albans and see our two-nil win can easily but wrongly conclude that we don't have a chance in hell to 'do anything' this campaign but of course, the result is not important. These games are important. Important to confirm things like how Liam Henderson is completely crap.
We could turn this view around and say well being three-nil up at half time against Boreham Wood we have every chance of doing well this season.

BOREHAM WOOD and ST. ALBANS! The painters, builders and the ex-Wales u21 player who never played for Man City as well as Barnet and Northampton who are in the lowest tier of league football. It does not matter. We have a 24-man squad at the most, 19 of whom are under 25 years-old! A scary statistic. Lots of players who have never performed on a first team stage and many who have hardly played for the club.

Yes Malky is short of funds we all know that and I'm sure many supporters are panicking at the lack of signings and loans but we need not panic just yet. We have to remember that Cleverley and Lansbury did not arrive until the season had started. We need experience. If you thought last seasons squad was young then this squad so far is beating it. We need at least two players who can come into this team, into the first team and show experience. Create more of a balance in the squad and act as a sort of babysitting role, much like Eustace is having to do on his own. I cannot help but feel signings such as Aldred and Gilmartin are ones for League 1.

Let this not be the case and it seems as if we really do need to get behind those golden boys because the squad at the moment needs every bit of help it can get. I still look very much forward to next season as I am sure many of you do but £31 for Norwich? A joke which is becoming all too regular in the world of football.

Monday, 12 July 2010

Hurry up August!

My only positive note from World Cup 2010 is not a footballing one but a social and economical one for not only South Africa but Africa as a whole. Well done, I applaud you for providing top quality stadiums and security and tuneful music during matches (die vuvuzela's).

We learnt that international football is completely pants and over-rated, containing many players who really do not wear their shirt with pride and would rather be at home shagging their cheating girlfriends or spending money on prostitutes whilst their girlfriend is out cheating. However despite the lack of class and exciting football we do notice a HUGE pro. This, is that in any kind of circumstance and however dire a situation is in a place, football will always come out on top and stronger. No amount of poverty, disease and death will prevent football of the highest stage being presented in such a well-mannered way. We must also mention North Korea. Not even the most secret, frightful and crazy nation in the world could stop themselves from competing.

The most pleasing banner seen at the World Cup...? A: "Kim-Jong-Il thinks I am at work."

With the warzone of a World Cup final now over, it's now time to focus on the upcoming season. I am sure you can agree with me when I say that we have to forget the last month of football, do some gardening for the next few weekends and then it all begins. The first match of the season. When all pre-season results count for nothing especially a 5-0 win vs Boreham Wood in early July. And as soon as that first Norwich goal flies in at 8pm on 6th August, the buzz of a new struggle begins.

Come on August, get a move on.

Thursday, 8 July 2010

Humiliating England

Not even the unexpected heat wave of early July could cover up our “Proud and Noble,” countries’ despicable display in South Africa this summer. The invisible passion and lack of commitment filled our high definition screens for a widely publicized three weeks as millions of customers tuned in to ITV HD on the 12th June only to miss one third of England’s goals this summer (or one forth). ‘The goal that never was’ sparked another debate about whether video technology should be introduced into football which then poses the question, why? We do not need more technology than HD and sky+ to see in a good quality picture and the ability to rewind live TV to watch action multiple times to tell us that the twenty-three picked England players were and are, well, over-paid, useless outcasts. Or if FIFA are really that bothered to assist three qualified and highly paid officials that cannot use their twenty-twenty vision to decide whether the perfectly round ball crossed the nicely painted, straight white line then instead of inventing brand spanking new technology, they can simply call a sky+ viewer, who, at a click of a button, can rewind his TV and confirm whether the ball definitely crossed that line!

So what now for the England set up? It is clear that every football fan in this country thinks he knows what is best for the team (Watford fans suggest a team full of Doyley’s) and better than Capello himself but will the Italian, post-June genius, go with his word and transfer his faith into the younger, more inexperienced players? The Adam Johnson’s, the Ashley Young’s and Gabby Agbonlahor’s almost certainly have the best chance they will ever get to impress the manager and firmly cement a place in the squad for the upcoming European qualifiers in September. Capello, flawless in qualifying, has come under tight scrutiny over his bemusing tactics and team selection has the full backing from the FA who made the wise decision in backing the 64 year-old. Of course we could dwell on particular decisions such as bringing 7-goal Heskey on instead of 21-goal Crouch with twenty minutes remaining and chasing a game but surely we must support him. His first job in international football has only brought five defeats in two and a half years and brought in a “no tolerance” policy with rules that include no mobile phones at the table and the gaffer to be answered to as “yes father.” Others however are hoping for the kidnapping and appointment of Paul the Psychic octopus as England’s new football adviser.